Do You Ever Have Days Where You're Not Feeling Your Spouse ...

Have you ever had one of those days where you?aren?t?feeling your spouse? If I can be completely honest for a second and share that both my husband and I have those days. I can almost immediately tell when my husband is not feeling me. There usually?aren?t?very many words said, but it?s quite clear that at certain times my quirky behavior, inquisitive nature and playfulness?aren?t?welcomed. So I acknowledge that what I need to do on those days is give him his space and go sit my behind down somewhere. Believe it or not it?doesn?t?bother me. Why should it? I also have those days. I feel irritable, annoyed and need alone time to get my mind right. Instead of nagging or nitpicking with my husband I ask for my time and I take it. If there were no space allowed just for me in my marriage, I would honestly lose my mind. Instead of hurting my spouse or being mean, I get quiet, reflect and am still.

Long ago, I accepted that every day in my marriage won?t be the same. My husband and I won?t always be lovey dovey or all over each other. With the daily stresses of our day jobs, my own business, our children, church and each other, it?s easy to see how one can become overwhelmed. One of the things that make our marriage work is our understanding of one another. I think after being married for 14 years and knowing each other for over 20 years we are comfortable and willing to accept the good days with the moody/crappy ones.

My husband can be confident in the fact that I am crazy in love with him. But I, just as most of you, will continue to have those days. Stress sometimes gets the better of us and we get overwhelmed by everything around us. As long as I don?t ever use those moments as an excuse to lash out, yell or hurt my husband, it?s normal. The best way to handle one of those days is by telling our spouse what we need and using that time as reflection and renewal. Remember it?s natural and it is just one of those days.

BMWK, how do you handle those stressful days in your marriage?

About the author

Tiya Cunningham-Sumter is a Certified Life & Relationship Coach and founder of Life Editing. She helps couples and individuals rewrite their life to reflect their dreams. Tiya was featured in Ebony Magazine in the October 2008 and November 2010 issues. She resides in Chicago with her husband and two children.

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Source: http://blackandmarriedwithkids.com/2012/10/do-you-ever-have-days-where-youre-not-feeling-your-spouse/

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